Bad Thing
by NikoLeto
Summary: A Russia Story. Am I to blame for the things that have happened? I've done my best, and yet all goes wrong. Where's the point? Show it to me. Tell me what it takes to be... free. Possible sequel/continuation being debated. Maybe collection of one-shots?


**Bad Thing**

_A Hetalia: Axis Powers Fanfiction _**  
**

Nico: Yo! Guess what I've been watching! ...Okay the story gives it away, but yeah, I've been watching Hetalia: Axis Powers! And History class hasn't been so fun since the year I learned about Medieval Times~!

I'm currently reading the manga and webcomic, and they are awesome~!

So while reading I came across the chapter when Russia started becoming insane. I know some people just find him downright creepy, and some people find him adorable, but I kind of understood how he felt during that time.

And thus this story was born (yes).

One quick note before the story: I did not find about the terminology of Hetalia, countries get sick when under economical pressure, until after I wrote the story, so bare with me please.

**I DO NOT OWN AXIS POWERS HETALIA!**

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* * *

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**Bad Thing  
**

"Vodka...Vodka...da..."

"Mr. Russia, you're much too sick, please just lay down and rest." Lithuania told me, his face was paler than usual.

Sick...How can I be sick? Right... General Winter finally caught me off guard. That stupid Latvia...This was all his fault...If only...

* * *

_"Ha-ha! So, Latvia, why do you always shake? Why? Why~?" I asked trying to stop him from shaking. I already knew that he would die if he ever stopped shaking. I know this because I've done it before. I was just wondering...could I do it a second time?_

_"M-M-M-Mr. R-R-R-R-R-Russia! P-p-p-p-please s-s-st-stop!" He stammered and sputtered as his trembling seemed to become more violent. _

_"Huh~? What was that? I didn't quite get that~" I pulled off my usual adorable face. This was fun. Latvia had a funny way with talking. I could never really understand what he was saying. _

_Then I felt something. It was a strange feeling. I've never really felt anything like it. However...it suddenly got really cold. The cold was comparable to the days when my sisters and I were all on our own. The cold was complemented with a numbing feeling, which seemed to crawl from my back to my limbs. My hands, which once held Latvia's elbows, cracked open. My arms fell to their sides, lifeless and dangling like ropes.  
_

_"M-Mr. R-R-Russia?" Latvia said when he was released. He looked up at me with a worried expression.  
_

_The cold seemed to grow to temperatures I've never experienced before. Even my jacket, scarf, boots, thick trousers, and gloves were no use; I felt like I was encased in ice. Soon my eyesight started to blur. It hurt my nostrils to breathe in through my nose. My breath no longer appeared in soft visible swaths. My head started to hurt, as if someone was drilling swords through my temples. I felt all my energy seep through every pore in my body, through the small orifices between the fabric of my clothes and leave me without saying the slightest goodbye. _

_"M-M-M-Mr. R-R-Russia?" Latvia's voice cracked as he screamed. His screamed hurt my numb ears. Why was he screaming? His face broke into an expression that showed explicit fear, however, I've never seen Latvia this shaken up. His eyelids were wider than they ever have been; as if he was giving his eyeballs the chance to jump out of their sockets. If we weren't surrounded in a winter wonderland at the moment, I'd imagine he would have fallen down. _

_I struggled to lower my head, in the direction of where Latvia's eyes were currently gazing at. There where I was standing, the packed snow, which was once white, was now reddened. _

_Then everything went black._

_

* * *

_Then I found myself back in my house, in my room, in my bed. General Winter is a great ally to have in battle, but ally or not, he will always come back and bring harm to me and my people, but especially me...

"M-Mr. Russia, would you like to take your scarf off?" Lithuania asked me. I rather liked Lithuania. I could tell that Estonia and Latvia really didn't feel comfortable with being near me, I don't have the slightest idea why. I could also tell Lithuania was like that as well, but not as much as the other two. He had once told me his dream, and he even once asked me about my dreams. Almost like...he actually cared.

"...Mm...no..." I struggled to say. My throat was itchy, but my hand is too big to reach down my mouth to scratch it. I currently lay in my bed, under warm covers, my jacket, scarf, a thick pair of socks, trousers, and mittens. For a normal person, they'd be sweating waterfalls. I guess I do not fall in that category, for I was still cold. Everything from my neck down was still shivering.

"Um...Mr. Russia, is there anything you'd like?"

"...Mm..." I thought for a moment. "Please keep my sisters away."

"Impossible." Lithuania answered quickly, as if he knew I was going to say that.

"...Vodka?"

"You're sick!"

"My magic stick."

"Absolutely not."

Lithuania was being unfair. If my sisters were to find out about my illness, Ukraine would definitely storm all the way here. She would cry crocodile tears and run back home chattering about how her boss had banned her from visiting me. As for Belarus...if she were to come, there was no hope for me to ever recover... I couldn't have vodka or my magic, instantaneous water flowing, stick. I'm sick, he asks me what I'd like, and I can't have them...

"...Sunflowers...?" I suggested.

"Mr. Russia," Lithuania seemed a bit surprised. This was only his second time ever hearing me talk about sunflowers. "I apologize, Mr. Russia, but...bringing sunflowers here...the cold alone will kill them." I watched how he seemed uncomfortable with his words, as if he was trying to pick out the right ones, like he actually cared that I would be hurt if he chose wrongly.

"P-perhaps...I should prepare some soup?" Lithuania asked, "Maybe that will warm you up."

I didn't respond. I merely nodded. With that Lithuania smiled, as if he actually cared, and turned around to leave. I watched as he left, gently closing the door, so that not a sound was to be heard from it.

And then it was silent. Silence... It used to be really noisy here once. I still remember that day...

* * *

_There were so many yells coming from outside my house. Everyone had gathered there, holding up my colors, signs with scary words on them, and banners with similar words on them as well. Everyone wore an angry face, as they chanted their words, and held their written words for all to see. Their faces were turning red; I wasn't sure which was causing this, the cold, their anger, or their tears. _

_I watched in horror, in the safety and warmth of my house. I could see _his_ face over the crowd, General Winter. He wore his usual crooked smile as he stared at me, the only one with a smile. _

_"They hate you, boy," I heard him say. "How many times have I told you before? You're a failure as a country. You can't do anything, and it is shown now." He rose his hands dramatically. "Can you hear them, Ivan? Can you hear their calls?"_

_"BRING US THE CZAR! THIS NATION HAS GONE MAD!"_

_"FREEDOM AND HIGHER WAGES!"_

_"THINK OF OUR SUFFERING!"_

_"Well, my boy? What are you going to do? You as the country that provides for them, what are you going to do? Are you going to run away again? Or are you going to do the noble thing and sign on my snow with what little blood you have left?" I felt my entire body shake as his words were said carefully. Like each word was a dagger, slicing carefully through the feeble protection my clothes and skin provided, into my flesh, letting my blood escape and travel through the fabric of my scarf. _

_"What's this? Silence?" A venomous chuckle followed. "Ivan Braginski, also known as the man of Russia. This is the man who controls this large land and its people? You're nothing but the same little boy I found, on the verge of death! I saved you back then, and your sisters. I even became your ally, but I am willing to break our alliance with how things are now."_

_"You wouldn't!" I exclaimed._

_"I would," he continued to smirk. He began to float closer to the window where I stood. "The only reason you and your sisters are alive are because of me. I gave you the chance to live, and I can just as easily take it back."_

_He stared at me with his eyes of ice then chuckled and turned away. "But, I won't yet. If I were to let you die, I wouldn't have anyone to bully. I could go for that Lithuania boy, or maybe that Canada kid, since they're a lot like you...only you're just a step away from insanity..."_

_"Please...leave..." I said. _

_He smiled and let out a roaring laughter. "You're still the same cowardly boy I've always known, Ivan. You've always been nothing but a bother, and everyone would probably be better off with you dead. You can't make your sisters happy, you can't make your colonies happy, you can't make your people happy, you can't even make yourself happy! You can't do anything right...and even though you think you've done everything in you power to bring your nation to happiness, the reason for their misery is because of their failure country, Russia."_

_"Stop!" I yelled. _

_"M-Mr. Russia?" I turned and there was Lithuania. He held in his hands the czar's agenda. I quickly turned away and stared at the riot outside. _

_"It's become rather serious," I said. Although I said that, I could barely hear my own words._

_"Um, it appears that His Highness is having tea in the palace..." Lithuania said, reading off the agenda. I turned my attention to the crowds of people._

_"I see..." Still I could not hear my own words. All I heard was a hammering sound. My chest hurt, like my someone had given my heart a hammer, and it was thrashing about trying to free itself from it's ribcage prison. My ears began ringing with a loud thumping sound, almost as my heart had succeeded in escaping, and was now on it's way to my head.  
_

_"But I'm sure they'll clear out by tomorrow..." Lithuania quickly assured me as usual. Lithuania...he's been so nice to me. Throughout all my troubles, he was there to help. Even though I had taken him from his friend... Yes... I suppose...General Winter is right. I'm not worthy of being Russia. I've done horrible things. I've taken people away from their family and friends. I've failed my people. I've brought everything and everyone to turmoil...why?_

_"..why does it always end up like this...?" I said aloud. I leaned my forehead to the cold glass of the window. Watching my vision of my people blur from the fog on the window. "I finally made this nation stronger and more prestigious than others by myself...I worked so hard...Why is it that nothing goes right...? Why do they always end up hating me?"_

_I felt something warm and wet trickle down my cheeks. My vision began to blur even more with tears. The thumping grew annoying, as if my heart had rooted itself in my head. I steadied myself by bringing my fists to the cold glass, even though I knew it was no use. I hate this...why was I such a crybaby? I hate myself. I'm useless, worthless, and weak._

_"Everyone says it's my fault. I've endured it for centuries. Why can't everyone get along nicely with each other...?" I begged for the answer to come to me. But there was none. I grabbed on the the handles of the windows and pulled them apart. The freezing winter air entered the room. A mixture of hail and snow entered through the opened wall. I felt the wind, hail, and snow all around me. For a minute...I felt dead, and there before me was my answer._

_"M-Mr. Russia?" Lithuania's voice came. _

_"Hey, Lithuania," I smiled and turned around. A happy smile was plastered on my face. On both my sides, the blood red curtains blew with the piercing winds. I calmly wiped away the tears in my eyes, and the trails they left on my cheeks. In my other hand was my musket. Behind me roared the angered voices of my people. Such wonderful voices. A wonderful orchestra of agony and betrayal. _

_"STOP THE WAR!"_

_"WAGES!"_

_"FREEDOM!"_

_"We'll destroy this nation!"_

_Ah, how wonderful they are. I want more. More sorrow, more fear. Those greedy little children...it's about time for them to learn their lesson. "We don't need children who can't play nice, right?"_

_

* * *

_Ah yes, those days. I hardly believe I can still remember that day, that permanently staining Sunday. Now that I remember, General Winter was right...

* * *

_It was so cold. Ukraine, Belarus, and I were all huddled up together. We used Ukraine's scarf so that it tied the three of us together, that way, we would be warm, and we wouldn't get lost. Our jackets and coats were worn and torn. When we first found them, they were a bit thicker, but now, in this environment, they were thinner than tissue._

_"It's cold..." I childishly said. My two sisters hummed in agreement. "Maybe...if we can find some wood...we can light a fire."_

_"No!" Belarus said and tightened her grip around me, however her arms only reached halfway around my body. Ukraine held the other half. "I'll go with you big brother. I'll stay with you forever." Her statement was bold, but was brought down with a sentence of coughs shortly afterward.  
_

_"Belarus," I said; our breaths were clearly visible in soft clouds. "I'd rather have something happen to me than you. You have to stay with big sister Ukraine, and wait for me, can you do that for me?"_

_"I don't want to!" Belarus snapped, then coughed again. Ukraine frowned, I guess she was a bit hurt at that._

_"Belarus...please? I promise I'll come back quickly, and when I am we can make a fire and we'll all be warm," I assured her. Her cheeks had puffed up in a stubborn pout, but then fell as she stared semi-angrily at me. _

_"Just don't be long..." she muttered._

_"I'll look after he, little Russia," Ukraine sniffed and smiled placing her hand on Belarus's shoulder, which didn't seem to fix her frown. _

_With that I ran off, picturing my two sister waving and huddling close together. I wandered into the forest, looking for branches, twigs, anything that wasn't wet with melted snow, and could create a spark. However, there was nothing. All the trees seemed to taunt me, with their mighty heights and their dry branches. I was just a small country, I could never be so great._

_"What are you looking for, dear boy?" A gruff voice came from behind me. It was rough like sandpaper, but allured attention like music. I turned around to see the source of this strange voice and found myself faced with an unfamiliar face._

_Before me was an old looking man. His hair was short and rough, and was pressed down by his metal helmet. His nose protruded from his fleshless face, slightly crooked. He was dressed in a tattered military uniform, but it was strange. In fact everything about the man was strange. When did he come? Where did he come from? Who was he? Why was he here? Moreover...why did every aspect of him make me shiver as his skin was pale as snow and slight blue in areas where people would regularly turn crimson?_

_"It's not safe being in these woods, my boy," the man smiled a crooked smile, his blue lips seemed to crack from the movement. Noticing I did not reply he continued, "You need not fear me, my boy. I am a kind old man, I can help you with your search. Tell me...what is your name?"_

_"Ru...Ivan Braginski..." I said, accidentally almost saying my country name._

_"Well, _Ivan_, my name is General Winter," he said sweeping his arm to the opposite side before bowing, a crackling sound once again. "How may I help?"_

_"Uh..." I wasn't sure if I could trust this old man, but Belarus and Ukraine were waiting for me. I had to hurry. "I-I'm looking for w-wood, for fire."_

_"Fire? Why would you want that?" the man raised an eyebrow; I guessed that this man must have had muscle problems, for every movement he made was followed with a cracking noise. "Fire will melt the snow and ice and cold. Here in the North, you do not get rid of the cold, you adapt and you endure it. You do not outsmart it, you overcome it."_

_"It's not for me, it's for my sisters," I said, trying to explain.  
_

_"I know of your sisters," the man smiled. "One gave you that scarf, and the other has longer hair with a bow."_

_"H-how..."_

_"Don't you think you should have stayed with them?" I was about to answer when the man continued, "Fire isn't going to save your sisters. They're dying, Ivan, and so are you. You don't know it, but it's quite obvious. There's no happily ever after for you here."_

_What was he saying? We were dying...Ukraine may have had a stuffy nose, and Belarus may have had a sore throat, but that was probably just a small cold. Also, I was perfectly fine! How could we..._

_"They're dying, my boy... you can't see it, but they're slowing slipping away..."_

_"No..." I took a step back, I no longer felt safe near the man._

_"What? You think running back and huddling together in that old scarf will solve everything?" The authenticity of his words scared me. He noticed this and his smile grew a couple cracks. I forced my head down, shutting my eyes tight, and covering my ears. However his voice pierced through, as if it came from my head, "I can help you, my boy. I can save your sisters, and I can save you. You'll all be safe, happily together forever."_

_I looked up at the discolored man. The smile still plastered on his bony face. "R-really...?"_

_"Of course, my dear boy," the man chuckled. His chuckles were mixed with the cricks and cracks from his body moving. "I'll do all that, but you have to pay up as well."_

_"W-what...?"_

_"For as long as you live, which will pretty much be forever until I say, I will have some control over your land, as well and you."_

_"H-huh?"_

_"It get's quite lonely here in the North, with you to keep me company, I won't be so lonely," the man continued to smile kindly._

_"Like...a-an alliance?" I asked._

_"Sure~" the man said. "So how about it, Ivan Braginski, an 'alliance' with General Winter, and your siblings and yourself saved from death?" The old man gave out a claw-like hand. Still unsure, but without much of a choice, I extended my hand towards his. His hands were like ice, encasing my hand, and shaking it twice before removing itself. _

_Then all I heard was laughter; a scary laugh. I felt the winds pick up, and everything became colder. Before the man was still smiling, as if nothing had changed. The cold winds and snow enveloped us. I quickly withdrew my hands into my tattered sleeves, hoping that they'd offer even the slightest protection against the cold. I closed my eyes and dug my face into the protection of my scarf. I wish I had a hat as the cold winds hit my red ears like glass.  
_

_"Little Russia!"_

_"Big brother!"_

_I looked up and I was back with my sisters. They were all better, neither of them were coughing or sniffling. _

_

* * *

_

I had no idea who that man really was, but I soon began to fear him. I soon realized that he was the one behind the weather in the land. He made it so that there was snow and cold. Whenever I spent too long out in the cold I could hear the cracking of his joints and the sound of his gruff laughter, stinging my ears. I soon began to fear leaving the house.

It was later on did I realize I had begun to change. The biggest change in me was that my heart had begun falling out. The first time was while I was taking a shower. The organ just suddenly fell out of my chest. There was utter silence, except for the disturbing sound of water against the porcelain tub. My heart lay beating, over the drain. The water from the shower began to accumulate, having nowhere to escape. My heart, obviously, was covered in blood, which began to mix with the water. I was probably standing there for a long time, because by the time I snapped out of it, I was standing in a tub full of blood and water.

I realized that General Winter had saved my sisters, but I was immortalized, or zombified if you will. The skin over my chest was rotted and and opened like a flap. I didn't quite understand, but apparently I have no blood pumping in my body. With a detaching heart, I could not really pump blood throughout my body. Without blood that affected me greatly. I got cold easily, thus I had to wear thick layers of clothes. My nerves weakened, and there are times I don't feel even the greatest pain. I soon began to realize I didn't need oxygen either. With no blood or oxygen, my brain had trouble functioning, and there were times I wondered just how I had stayed sane for so long.

So how do I describe myself? I was the literal walking dead. My body showed signs of rotting, thus I had to keep most of my body hidden from wandering eyes. My heart continued to escape my ribcage and out through the open flap of skin, and once even fell out during a meeting with the Allies. Boy was that embarrassing... There are times I feel my brain just shuts off due to the fact I had stopped breathing for a short while, and I end up completely unaware of what is happening.

How I continue to live is through General Winter's power. I stay alive, while my body begins to rot before my eyes.

"Your physical body will die, but your spiritual mind will continue through, you probably eventually posses some poor human until their body rots as well." Was Winter's exact words. So...I was a ghost?

"In a way. Think of it this way, you know those stories with people and their hourglass? When all the sand from the hourglass runs to the bottom, the person dies? Well for you, your hourglass is almost up, only one tiny grain of sand remains, but sticks to the surface of the glass."

That one tiny grain of sand was my heart. While almost everything else in my body has shown signs of deteriorating, my heart, although falls out, stays beating. The day my heart is struck, is the day I die. Or that's what General Winter told me. I'm not sure.

I still think... one of these days, I'm going to die. I don't know how I'm going to die, or when it's going to happen. All I know is that no one is going to miss me.

* * *

"Mr. Russia... Mr. Russia?" I heard a knock on my door.

I shook and realized I was still gazing at the door. There, Lithuania poked his head through the opening. Once again, my brain had shut off without me noticing.

"Are you alright, Mr. Russia?" Lithuania asked taking cautious a step in.

"...Da," I said. Lithuania sighed a breath of relief. He was wearing his apron, the apron he wore only when cooking. In his hands was a silver tray with similar cover on top, keeping whatever was inside, hidden. Right, he had told me he was going to get something for me...what was it again...vodka?

He placed the tray on the side table, and revealed the large china bowl that stood on a plate with a similar design. No, that's not vodka.

"Will you be able to eat this yourself, Mr. Russia?" Lithuania asked.

"Da," I said, staring at the smoke that left the bowl. Don't go, you're supposed to stay to keep the soup warm, and then the soup is supposed to keep me warm.

"Alright, um, someone came by with something for you, Mr. Russia, would you like to see it now?" Lithuania asked, folding his hands in front of him.

"Da," I said picking up the metal spoon and stirring it in the soup. I had recently began to wonder if Lithuania had realized my changes. He probably had, I remember those nights when General Winter's taunts had gotten the best of me. On those days I snapped at any of the Baltics who dare tried to speak in my presence.

However, in the end it would always come to me beating Lithuania. This... this was not what I had imagined many years ago when we first met. I wanted to be friends, even if it meant stealing him away from his best friend. Although I didn't want to, my boss made Lithuania a servant. I never saw him as such, I believed he and I could be friends. That's what I believed, then everything changed. I began hurting him, and he began crying. Those nights, I'd spend with him in my room...

I would grab him by his beautiful brown locks and throw him against the wall, over and over again. His blood was smeared onto the wall, and spilled over the carpet and onto the sheets. He would scream in such pain, which I could no longer understand. He was strong though, he never once told me to stop. He never begged, he just took every lash to his back. Estonia and Latvia would have already begged for their lives the minute they knew I was angry.

Lithuania was different, silent. With the occasional groans, he never really spoke out loud. However I heard he once whispered the tiniest words. Calling the name of his best friend, and reciting the conversation we had as children. I would stop attacking him then, and instead I would bury myself with the blood he had spilled, the only warmth in the room.

"Mr. Russia, these came for you," Lithuania came in as I popped the spoon in my mouth. I turned around and was blinded by a sight I had only seen in picture books.

Sunflowers... big, blooming, sunflowers.

Lithuania handed me the brightly wrapped bouquet. I looked at the red label, and then I felt like I was dying. Although now... that might no longer be a bad thing.

* * *

DONE!

This took a long time to write! Nonetheless, I had so much fun writing this~I believe I started some time back in September when I started taking interest in Russia fanfics.

So this story has been in my mind and has been preventing me from writing Requiem of Rain (sorry Reborn! fans!). It's my take on Russia's insanity. He used to be sane, now he's crazy, and doesn't even notice it, as the creator of Hetalia stated. The zombie thing, that was just something I thought of to explain Russia's heart falling through layers of tissue, as well as his rib cage, and out of his body, and it worked... I think.

I should probably take the time now to say something very important. I am going to be putting all my stories on hiatus until further notice. I hope this doesn't affect anyone, it's just that I have a major fanfiction I'm doing for my History teacher. Yes, it is another Hetalia Fanfiction (yay for Hetalia fans!) (Sorry for Reborn! fans...). The story is relatively long, by its number of chapters, although the chapter sizes are no longer than a page so far. So it might be a while until I continue my other stories, I'm really sorry. I just really have to get it done, because I borrowed my History teacher's Teacher Notes (with permission!) and I don't want to hold on to it for too long!

Perhaps some Reborn! fans will also enjoy the Hetalia fanfiction? Yes?

Well the new story will be called Diplomacy, please look out for it! (Once again I am sorry...)


End file.
